Before that, i had wanted to be a radio dJ after listening to countless hours of Patrick Teoh on Radio 4 and seeing the effects of what they say on their programmes had on their devoted listeners who tune in everyday. I wasn't much of a fan of the person behind the voice, however, i was more so interested to see what has this guy have to say to tick people off today. This guy is surely one of the straightest shooter on this side of the planet. he was Simon Cowell even before $1m0n c0w311 became $1m0n C0W311. i meant that in the nicest way, of course.
He would just tell off stupid people who calls into his show exactly how STUPID they were. HE of course is a well read and brilliant person, i'm sure. And though he didn't claim to be a genius, he'd certainly would put an Idiot in his place.
and when i was in Sheffield, there was a radio programme on Hallamfm that ran every monday to Friday at 11, which reminded me of patrick's show. the host is Nicholarse and how i miss it. if i wanted to catch it, i'd have to be up at 6 every morning to catch the streaming broadcast over the net. he was different only in the way he came up with provocative statements just for farks' sake. then he'd get whole lot of dumb brits calling up to make stupid comments, racist comments, sexist comments and only a hand full of people who cna actually contribute by giving a the listeners a fair discussion on whatever the topic of the day was.
I, on the other hand, want to be a tad funny, a tad sarcastic, humourous in style and but very intelligent in my style of interview. I want to be able to enlighten my listerners/readers about the things they should really, really know (General Knowledge!!!!111omg!!!11) and things that are just blatantly obvious, without actually saying them straight. in that way, they'd only realise they'd been stoopified like 3 hours after the thing had been done with. that'd be the BOMB!
So, my first interview subject would be a person very close to all of us. I shall embark on a mission to get to know him much better and hope to get his permission to publish it here. i will meet G in a bit and very soon i will post up the interview. keep watch.
til then, besame mucho.
THE interVIEW
HEre is the second part of this post, and may i add the interesting bit. Yes, it's none other than the interview with the beloved self-styled *metropolitan male, G.
B: First of all, i'd like to thank you for agreeing to be interviewed. We all know how busy you are now with your current involvement in the Carlsberg program.
G: Well, it is a great pleasure and also a true honour to be the first anti-celebrity to be interviewed. I am truly excited and as you can probably tell, i am getting a bit wet in the panties because of it.
B: Oh, BLIMY! Well, since we're on that subject, G, care to enlighten the world on how did that whole panty stealing fiasco between you and that DAvID Guy came about?
G: ahahahhahah.... Well, it happened like this. one evening we were driving past a house in SS2 and i asked him if he knew who Carmen $oo was, and he said yes, the model and very HOT girl next door celeb lah. I then told him this is where she stays. He was first shocked but very quickly suggested that we steal her panties.
B: ah? is That so? are you telling me that you both went and stole her panties?
G: no, no, no. We didn't do that together.
B: so you are saying that you did it alone behind your partner's back?
G: that's a malicious rumour with, so far, no sufficient evidence.
B: well, moving on. there has been talks amongts those in the CIRCLE that you walk on the queer side of town. What is your comment on that? i mean, when was the last time you had some lady loving, man?
G: Again, that rumour is unsubstantiated. But i would like to stress that i do love women. I like their look, their feminine ways, the way they smell... the whole works, a'ight. I is not gay.
B: why do you say that? do you have anything towards gay? Don't get me started but, they is people too. they is need LOVE too.
G: well, i am not a sexualist. i am fine with gays as long as they don't they don't gay me up, a'ight?
B: That's great. Now, tell me, in your many years in the industry as an event organiser, both corporate events as well as private ones, and may i add, a very successful one at it, what is your most memorable moment?
G: Well, in every event, there is always something special that i will bring with me.
B: Now, that's mighty diplomatic. But honestly, which one you liked best.
G: Now, if push come to shove, i would choose the day i chose to intentionally let one rip right in the middle of maths tuition. I mean, that one didn't take much planning. In fact it was only minutes before i farted that i decided that they all should be subject to this wonderful gift. I mean, i am always known to be quite the charming speaker in my days. In fact my mom had told me since i was young that i had the gift of the GAS.
B: ahahhahah...
G: WEll, but really, i would say the balloon party we threw mid last year. that was the best. the whole gang came. though it wasn't as big as the christmas do, this one had all the closest friends where everyone knew everyone else and we were so comfortable in each other's company. I like the closeness.
B: yes. i remember that night. well, the cold water seems to bring out a lot in a person. (snickers)
G: ah, yes...
B: well, that's aLl the time we have for tonight. thanks again for this wonderful session. I'm sure that the readers will agree.
G: thank you too. I hope to be on again.
B: well, that depends. don't push it, nephew.
G: are you gonna let me drive your car now?
B: no.
G: but you said i could drive it if i let you ask me questions and touch me there...
B: sod off. walk home!
So there you have it... who wants to be next?
